DEAR GOD,

AT THIS TIME I AM PASSING THROUGH WITH ANGUISH IN MY SOUL. I SEE BEYOND THE SYSTEM OF THIS WORLD, I SEE YOU LORD AND I FEEL ANGUISH. WHEN I SEE YOUR TRUTH IT ALLOWS ME TO SEE THE LIES OF THIS WORLD AND IT CAUSES ANGUISH. I KNOW LORD HOW MUCH YOU LOVE YOUR PEOPLE AND IT HURTS YOU MORE THAN ANYTHING. REMEMBER LORD BEFORE THE FLOOD WHEN YOU HAD GRIEVED THAT YOU MADE MAN AND YOUR HEART WAS FULL OF PAIN. OH DEAR GOD IF I AM FEELING THIS,  HOW MUCH MORE ARE YOU, SO MUCH MORE. I AM SOMETIMES NO DIFFERENT THAN THE WORLD AND GET CAUGHT UP IN THE LIES BUT THAN WITH YOUR LOVING DISCIPLINE YOU BRING ME BACK. I HATE THE FLESH THAT CONSUMES MY MIND BUT THAN I REALIZE IT CAN NOT CONSUME MY SPIRIT, WHICH IS YOU. THE BATTLE IS RAGING AND YOUR PEOPLE ARE SURRENDERING TO THE OTHER SIDE. LORD HELP ME TO PUT THE ANGUISH ASIDE AND TO PUT ON MY BREASTPLATE. USE MY HEART TO CHOSE AND BELIEVE YOU. LOVE LINDA 

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I thought I knew who God was until I had a knock at my door, it was Jesus! He asked if He could come in. He said that He died on the cross for me and has a new life to give me. He said that He loved me unconditionally and will take care of me. I so willing said yes, please do come in. Linda He said, we need to do some house cleaning, clean closets, rearrange and put things in order. Yes, I said, but my closets are full and dirty. I love you no matter what you have stored in those closets, He said. As He started to clean, I felt uneasy, He was throwing out the pain and misery I had been so accustomed to. He then replaced it with joy and happiness. He must have a million closets of mine to clean because He's still cleaning. He doesn't just clean either He tears them down and rebuilds them so beautifully!!!! Lord thank you for that day that you came into my life, it hasn't been the same since, and thank you Lord for rearranging my life.

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How many times do I have to walk around MT. Sinai to realize how much God loves me and will lead me on His path. As I walk, I keep ending up at the same place, I am walking in circles. Maybe if I take a different path I will find a way out. I keep getting tangled in the shrubbery, the weeds seem to be growing taller and taller with each passing. Dear God I want to move on, I want to leave Mt. Sinai, please show me a way out. With this choice I had in my heart he did show me a way out. No matter where I am walking, nothing makes sense without choosing Him at all times. This world is a jungle full of weeds and the roads are dead ends. Sure I put my energy into this world to survive, but to survive for what, a hopeless effort? God truly owns every inch of this world, He owns the map to my life to show me which path to take. He can do anything, He is the creator. So do I continue to walk in circles in frustration, or do I chose the one key word "believe" Him and only Him. I'll take the latter, I love looking at the rainbow at the end of each path!

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Lord, when I grow old and my days will come to an end, will I say that they
were spent well or were they meaningless? Did I appreciate how much you really
love me or did I take you for granted? The time I spent, was it mostly on
myself and the things of the world, or did I invest it in others? I hope I
will have shared the experiences you brought into my life with the people you
love so much. When the last day of my life will arrive will I say, did I do
this and did I do that or will I remember to say you did it all. Thank you
Lord for loving me no matter what.

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My Lord My God where are you? I have been feeling empty and alone. My heart has been squeezed to where it hurts. I have been living off the fuel of this world that brings only pain. Lord, the more I understand you the more I suffer because you show me the truth. Lord, give me an understanding not to just see but to feel the love and beauty you have to offer. Thank you so very much Lord, for today you have given me just a glimpse. I not only can see the rose you have created but I can feel the love you put into each petal to bring beauty to our eyes. Forgive me for what I have taken for granted. You opened
my eyes once again, you have taken another piece of me to conform me in You. You were always there, I guess I was just away at school. Tomorrow morning the sun shall rise and I want to be there to see and feel another beautiful creation You chose for us, but most of all it is when your son Jesus Christ
the Son of God Lord of Lords that truly suffered for us so that we could be set free and see the truth, the beauty and feel the love that You had died for on that cross, and you rose again for us. For us. For us. For us. For us. For us.

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My Dear Sweet God, how wonderful You are to always meet my needs. Sometimes Lord, I search for my needs to be met and wander into this world of loneliness. I look to be satisfied to bring peace and gratification into my being. I've searched through other people, I've grasped at worldly things, I have walked amongst Your creation  and all is empty without You. Lord when I look back on all the years I have known You, You are the only one that has met my every need. When my heart is hurting You caress it. When my thoughts become confused, You open my mind to new truth. When my soul goes astray, You tenderly put it back. When I'm afraid , You hold me. When I was lost, You gave me Your Son Jesus Christ. How much more can I want? How much more can I search for? How much more is there? Only You, only, only You can meet my needs. You quench my thirst Lord and all I have to do is ask.

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I have felt the freedom of Your grace, I am who I am to be and You love me still without thought. Your laws have charged me to plead guilty but your grace has bailed me out. I can not see until You open my eyes. I can not hear until You speak. I can not feel until You touch me. When I do not step aside and allow Your grace to abound, I fail. No matter what I do or what I feel, Your love never ends. What a fool I am to be bound to the chains of this world. Only when I choose to unlock those chains that hold me tight, can I experience the freedom of Your grace.

Thank You,

Love Linda

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